Friday, April 9, 2010
Hi All!
This week, I plan to post about You! Write to me and let me know the topic that you want information on. I will reply and post on my blog about that problem. So this week, let me know what do you want to read about.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Toddler's First day of school
This one is for all those parents who's toddlers start school soon....
Its that time in your life when you are both relieved about your child securing a sear in a school and are anxious about sending him/ her away from you.
Foa ALL of us, our child is our most precious creation therfore is the BEST child in the world1
The first reaction that we have when someone criticizes our child is- How dare they!
There is one thing that we must all remember- Each Child is different.
The very thought of someone else controlloing our child scares us. We are anxious about how our child will behave and how will he be recieved in the new environment. We all have our sources of reference for our opinions. Some of our opinions are guided by what our parents told us about our first day of school, friend's experiences, stories or neighbours.
The anxiety that you are experiencing right now is called 'seperation anxiety'. Your toddler may be experiencing it more than you. Seperation anxiety is a normal reaction of a toddler but when we as parents pass on our anxiety to them, we made it very difficult for the child to adjust to the new situation.
The child looks at you for reassurance to ease his anxiety but if you are anxious, guilty, confused, worried, you will in turn increase his anxiety.
Before he starts school, you could do the following things that may help him:
1. Introduce him to strangers and let him be in the company of starngers for sometime while you watch from a distance. He should getv used to being with people becuae at this stage, his social skills will determine his adjustment at school.
2. Set a routine for him so that he gets into the habit of following one.
3. Talk to him about various things that he can look forward to. Get him excited about school, new friends, new books, new teacher, playground or whaever else appeals to him.
4. Answer ALL his queries and questions no matter how irrelevant they may seem to you. Never make fun of him. Let him understand that you understand his anxieties and that you are always there for him.
5. Tell him clearly who is going to drop/ pick him and you must follow it otherwise he will not trust you.
6. Tell him clearly what all are you going to put in his bag. Get him used to the idea of being responsible for his own bag and make sure he knows what to find where in it.
7. Explain to him clearly about whom to ask if he wishes to go to the toilet.
8. Never threaten him or develop an association between school and punishment.
9. when he starts school, ensure that you are informed about what is happening at school so that you can help him be at pace with the others in class.
10. Take the teachers advise constructively.
11. Listen to him, no matter how long it takes.
Your child, besides learning to read, will also learn social skills, collaborative play, taking orders and trusting people.
The most important thing that your child must understand and believe is that YOU are always there for him and that school is a fun place where he will be meeting new friends and will have the teacher as a guide.
If you want more tips or information, write to me..........
Its that time in your life when you are both relieved about your child securing a sear in a school and are anxious about sending him/ her away from you.
Foa ALL of us, our child is our most precious creation therfore is the BEST child in the world1
The first reaction that we have when someone criticizes our child is- How dare they!
There is one thing that we must all remember- Each Child is different.
The very thought of someone else controlloing our child scares us. We are anxious about how our child will behave and how will he be recieved in the new environment. We all have our sources of reference for our opinions. Some of our opinions are guided by what our parents told us about our first day of school, friend's experiences, stories or neighbours.
The anxiety that you are experiencing right now is called 'seperation anxiety'. Your toddler may be experiencing it more than you. Seperation anxiety is a normal reaction of a toddler but when we as parents pass on our anxiety to them, we made it very difficult for the child to adjust to the new situation.
The child looks at you for reassurance to ease his anxiety but if you are anxious, guilty, confused, worried, you will in turn increase his anxiety.
Before he starts school, you could do the following things that may help him:
1. Introduce him to strangers and let him be in the company of starngers for sometime while you watch from a distance. He should getv used to being with people becuae at this stage, his social skills will determine his adjustment at school.
2. Set a routine for him so that he gets into the habit of following one.
3. Talk to him about various things that he can look forward to. Get him excited about school, new friends, new books, new teacher, playground or whaever else appeals to him.
4. Answer ALL his queries and questions no matter how irrelevant they may seem to you. Never make fun of him. Let him understand that you understand his anxieties and that you are always there for him.
5. Tell him clearly who is going to drop/ pick him and you must follow it otherwise he will not trust you.
6. Tell him clearly what all are you going to put in his bag. Get him used to the idea of being responsible for his own bag and make sure he knows what to find where in it.
7. Explain to him clearly about whom to ask if he wishes to go to the toilet.
8. Never threaten him or develop an association between school and punishment.
9. when he starts school, ensure that you are informed about what is happening at school so that you can help him be at pace with the others in class.
10. Take the teachers advise constructively.
11. Listen to him, no matter how long it takes.
Your child, besides learning to read, will also learn social skills, collaborative play, taking orders and trusting people.
The most important thing that your child must understand and believe is that YOU are always there for him and that school is a fun place where he will be meeting new friends and will have the teacher as a guide.
If you want more tips or information, write to me..........
Friday, March 26, 2010
I Know what you are going through- Humiliation
This is for those of you who are feeling humiliated today!
Let us first understand what you must be feeling:
Let us first understand what you must be feeling:
- Insulted and Hurt
- Angry, Irritated
- Depressed
- Helpless
- Powerless
- Remembering other event where you felt humiliated in the past.
The following thoughts must be going on in your mind:
- This is not fair
- how dare they
- I will take revenge
- what will others think of me
- Is this why I had put in so much effort!
- I am fed up with the person, the situation and with my life, I cant take this any more
- Only if I were in xyz position, I would have set him/ her right. That person does not deserve the present position
- That person does not deserve my respect.
Lets try to understand why this anxiety and unrest are there in your mind:
Your dignity and honour are hurt. Your ego is hurt and you are feeling powerless, degraded and disrespected because you disagree with the humiliation. If you agreed it was your fault, you would feel ashamed but not humiliated. You are at the recieving end. You feel this way because in the process of being humiliated, three parties are involved:
1. Humiliator- Powerful
2. You the victim- powerless
3. Witness- Audience.
You feel powerless and helpless because you are in a relationship with the humiliateor, either at workplace or in your personal life. You feel you demonstrate lack of power in the relationship as a result of which vindictive thoughts emerge.
But you must remember- the situation is such because of 'YOUR' perception of it.- "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"- Elenor Roosevelt.
Lets look at what can you do about it!
- Talk to a love done- it helps
- Stop blaming- it will only make you more vindictive and will harm you in the long run
- Speak to the humiliator. Do not react, talk it out- this prevents long term damage
- Remember, the audience will not judge you based on one event, their impression of you is based on a series of interactions.
- Practice humility- the truely humbe person cannot be humiliated- Donald Klein.
- Be confident of yourself. Do not let your self image be dependent on what others think of you.
- A thoughtful approach will prove benificial for you and the humiliator will not be successful in his/her intent.
- Learn to forgive because forgiveness is the best gift that you can give to yourself.
If you have other queries, write to me..........................
Thursday, March 25, 2010
I Know what you are going through!
Hi All!
Have you ever wished that there was someone who would really understand what you are going through!
Have you ever searched the net to find answers to your problems or just to confirm or check whether you are the only one experiencing certain symptoms!
Have you ever secretly wished that someone will hold you and tell you that its going to be all right!
Have you ever been scared, inquisitive, worried, hassesled and wished that someone would help!
If yes, then this blog may answer some of your queries.............
Read on...... Welcome Aboard...........Our Journey begins............
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